Friday, October 11, 2013

in the furnace of honesty!

[quoting Jeff Foster]The healthiest relationships are not necessarily the ones that look 'happiest' to the naked eye. They aren't necessarily the ones where two people are always seen holding hands, giggling, dancing and singing with the butterflies, where nothing ever 'goes wrong' and life is always perfect. External perfection can easily mask internal devastation, disconnection and a quiet, unspoken desperation to be free, or at least alone.

The healthiest relationships are the honest ones, the ones that might not always look 'happy' or 'carefree' from the outside. The ones that might not fit the image of what a relationship 'should' or 'must' look or feel like. Where two people tell the truth about today, and continually let go of all their preconceived ideas about each other. Where the relationship is forever renewed in the furnace of honesty. Where there may be ruptures, misunderstandings, even intense feelings of doubt and disconnection, BUT there is a mutual willingness to face this seeming mess head-on! To look - with open eyes - at the present rupture, and not turn away or cling to the past. To sit together in the midst of mutual shattered dreams and expectations, and work to find a place of reconnection, here, now, today. Where relationship is seen as the ultimate yoga - an ongoing and deepening adventure and rediscovery of each other, a constant meeting, not a future destination, fixed conclusion, point of arrival, or a convenient story to tell others during polite conversation.

As Eckhart Tolle says, relationships aren't here to make us happy (for true happiness lies within) - they're here to make us profoundly conscious.
-Jeff Foster